Keep the flame of Hope always burning.....

Nice!!

2011-04-01T01:19:00.000-07:00

I got a forwarded mail from Malar today. Thanks to her , I started my day on a very positive note. The essence of it stirred all emotions in me and I had a new ray of hope that I can write in the same way someday.

Can’t help but put this as a post in my blog :-) !!

The Stranger

She was getting engaged.
And all I could do was stand by and applaud along with all.
I didn’t dare opening my mouth for fearing of saying something stupid , something like “I LOVE YOU”.

I remembered the other day when she had come to me with red eyes. Her “best friend” was going away. It had never mattered to me that her best friend was a guy. But her tears awoke the sin of jealousy in my heart. Fighting it , I had consoled her and given her chocolates to eat. She proceeded to rest her head in the crook of my arm. And promptly fell asleep. I chuckled at her bay-like innocence. But now , as I applauded , I felt something stabbing at my heart.

She was getting married.
I saw her come down the stairs decked out in her bridal finery. Never had I seen her looking this pretty. I saw her taking the seven rounds around the sacred fire with the man I had come to hate , holding his hand.I saw her exchanging garlands with him.

She was a total stranger to me now.

I saw her standing near the car when they both came over to me. I wondered what they wanted. I wondered how to say farewell to the Departed.
Nevertheless , as my daughter and son-in-law touched my feet , I blessed them. She was openly crying , I told her not to worry. That I will always be there.
She responded by hugging me. And I could not stop the tears anymore.

I was MOVED!!!!
Can any one of you not think that the stranger was a lover boy ?? Did anyone expect that the emotions portrayed were of the father’s ?
I re-read everything again and it seems to be a perfect match to a father’s feelings as well. I was just imagining Prakash Raj in Aakaashamantha :-).
Brilliantly Written !! :-)

A Sunday Morning – Just before Valentine’s Day !!

2011-02-13T08:05:00.000-08:00

I woke up in the morning with a call from Offshore Batch Support guys about a job abend. Saw the time and it was about to be 6. Solved it and suddenly thought NOT to go back to sleep and enjoy these early morning moments. I got out of bed and brushed. Then turned on the TV and the movie “Guddi” was playing :-). Nice movie to start off the day. Old Hindi movies always a pleasure to watch. BTW , one of my all time favourites in old Hindi category is “Parichay”. I just love Jayabhaduri of those days. I made myself some tea as my throat was craving for it :-).

Finished it off and came outside our flat to phone my mom. She would be waiting for it on weekends. The morning chillness turned me really ON. Wow.... what a weather :-) !!! And trees and greenery in San Marino are like awesome. I called my mom and got to know that she is outside. She said she would call me back. So took a little walk and came to the lawn area of our complex and sat down alone.

It suddenly struck to me that this was like a perfect morning. I am enjoying it so much and after sometime felt that I should blog :-).
So went back home and brought my lappy here. I am sitting here in the lawn of San Marino on a Sunday morning blogging !! :-) Wow......this is one of my idealistic and perfect situations in life that I always crave for :-).
And that too , just the before day of Valentine’s Day!!!!

Valentine’s Day is special for me in TWO ways. One because it is the day when people CELEBRATE LOVE and the other is............. this is the day I MET R exactly two years back :-).
I can’t help but feel nostalgic and have butterflies in my tummy when I think of that day :-).

If I just go back the pages of my memory , lemme think what I can remember.
R was travelling back to India and he was to land at Hyd on the 14th. And they had to come and see me on the same day.
I was taking bath and my father shouted that I got a call on my cell and he took it and it was R and wanted to talk to me.
I was really bewildered with his boldness and all that. Because , our marriage was not yet fixed. We just talked over phone in the last one month and now we wanted to see each other in order to make that decision.
So frankly I was a little surprised at his boldness in calling me just before our “Pelli choopulu”. Obviously , our every move was scanned by our respective parents ;-).

Anyways , forget about that. I did not even try calling him back :-). They had to come sometime in the afternoon. You know right... our parents , they had some “Muhurtam” for “Pelli Choopulu” as well. Huhhh!!!!
It’s better to keep mum about it. I got ready and sat in a “Blue” saree as R liked Blue and Black. Obviously I was not allowed to wear a Black , so I wore a Blue one. I was mentally prepared for one particular time and they had actually come in a little early. My mother suddenly came in and said we had to go to the Hall. I was not at all prepared. I was so relaxed inside. Suddenly , my heart began thumping like never before and I felt I will fall down there itself. I was that scared. But didn’t have much of an option so was literally by all means DRAGGED outside by my mother :-). And I guess R saw that as well and smiled at it.

Like a lame lamb , I staggered and went and sat in front of them. There were only 3 people. R , my mom-in-law and R’s Babai. As usual , the first question R’s Babai asked was my name and I repeated it. I saw R and I just could not connect to the person I saw in the photos. He was so different , basically because of his hair cut. His photos at JoBurg were with long hair and he had a haircut just before he came to India. And the rest was like some movie story. We went to my room to chat alone. But then , we could not speak anything. All my cousins started pouring in one by one and got introduced to R. It was frankly pissing off as I wanted sometime alone with him :-). We didn’t speak anything at all. He asked me if it was a Yes from me and I said “Yes” :-). But then , the thing that scared me the most was our marriage date :-(

Wow... I remember so much of what happened two years back. Isn’t it like some movie clipping ;-). Good na. But then , you know what. Before my so called “Pelli Choopulu , I took a promise from my father that he would allow me and R to go out to a restaurant or somewhere to spend some time alone. My father promised that he would convince R’s parents and let us go. But that became a flop show as it was Valentine’s Day and it was not safe to roam around outside as places would be too crowded and stuff. See , some advantages and some disadvantages.

So.... this was my story people!!!! Wow.. I just can’t help blushing at how I blogged this whole thing sitting on a bench in our lawn on a Sunday morning !!!! :-)

Expression :

2011-02-06T02:45:00.000-08:00

I don’t know what is happening to me. At one point of time , I used to be “the most” expressive of all. And now , I feel that I have lost that character in me :-(. Last week , one of my good friends left SA. We have spent some good times together and I will cherish them. But I was not able to look into her eyes and say that I will miss you. And this week , another good friend is leaving. She told me today that she is gonna miss me. But I just couldnot reply saying “I will miss you too”. Why am I hiding my emotions so badly ?? My college friends used to say that I am the most expressive of all and stuff. Then , what happened to me now ??
The same thing happened when my mom left. She said many times that its gonna be difficult when she goes back and she really missed me badly. But then on the last day , I was not even able to tell my mother “I will miss you”. I avoided eye contact with her.
I was never like this……….. and this behaviour is worrying me :-( !!!!!

My Gift to R on this special day - This Post !!!

2011-01-14T09:19:00.000-08:00

Jan 14th 2011 : A broad smile on my face. And to know why…. Read on :-)

Its been two years since I and “R” met….. Now “Met” in the sense , we spoke to each other for the first time. He was in JoBurg and I in Hyd in our own worlds , when this day came with a BANG :-).
Today , I am glad it did. But way back in 2009 , I didn’t like it much. My mom told me about R and their family proposal that had come in……. on the 13th of Jan. Please guys……. Make a note….. 13th of Jan. She just told me his name and said that he also worked in Wipro and asked me to search our official internal Finder for him. And I did , and found him. She asked me how he looked and I said….. “Yeah , okay”.

I said this many times to many guys as it was a daily ritual in my home to browse through matrimonies and asking me to search someone in the Wipro Finder. So I didn’t take it seriously. I just said it.
And then…. Came the news…. She told me that they had already matched both our horoscopes and it seems they matched well. And further on that , they spoke to R’s father in the afternoon for the first time and they wanted more photos of me. Now….. my ego came in. How dare someone asks more photos of me ;-) I kind of didn’t like it. But then , my mom said that they were sending them. She just gave me information :-).

And then the D-day. It was Sankranthi and festive time. At around 11 in the morning , we got a call again , from R’s father giving my father R’s number and asking us to talk to him if interested.
Now…. This was a shocker !!!!!!!! And then instantly , I got the next shocker……….. my father called me and said we are talking to him………. NOW !!!! I was left without any preparation……. NUMBBBBB!!!!

My father spoke to him for 5 mins and then gave it to me. The conversation left me even numb and confused.
The first sentence that came out of Ravi was that he already knew about me and that he checked my orkut profile , blog and everything. And he was all praises for me and also told me that his friends in SA also had read my blog and think it was good and all that. My expression was like………….. “Hold on a sec , we are speaking for the first time and you say that you know me already and everything”. I couldn’t take it……….but then I didn’t show it to him :-).
I finally managed to wrap up the conversation and sat down for 1 hour analysing what happened just now and tried sinking it into my brain.

That day , I was completely baffled , but then now , I laugh it out and celebrate it J. Obviously , it gotta be sweet and memorable. Because that day , I hardly knew that I was gonna marry this guy ;-) !!!!!

Break Ke Baad : Review

2011-01-07T05:24:00.000-08:00

I had to post this long long back.... but could not do it due to various reasons. Didn’t want to miss it and hence here it is.

We happened to go to a Meta Fantabulous movie called “ Break Ke Baad”.Wow!! What an experience!! I guess I should punish myself for opting to it. Ravi was suggesting that we have got a CD so we can watch it at home. But Nah , I didn’t listen. All my fault.

The first jolt I got was when the heroine takes out a jumbo size Cigar ( Cigar , mind you... not a cigarette ) and smokes it. I don’t know where the people are , who made a hue and cry seeing Aishwarya Rai in Guzarish with a cigarette. And she kind of passes sarcastic comments on her own mom and declares that she would lose her virginity at 20. Ofcourse not after marriage and stuff. Wonder where the women activists are. She calls people as emotional fools and she is out of all that stuff. I guess she is one rare kind of prodigy born on earth.... and that too a woman.

The entire story was ultimately frustrating and showing Imran compromise always , made my blood boil. Wonder why he agreed to portray such a boneless character. I agree that any relationship calls for some kind of a compromise. But then , the amount to which this guy falls down is too much. The heroine calls her idiotic behaviour as “trying to explore life” , “taking risks” and “being cool”.

The story goes like this...... Aliya and Gulati are childhood friends, but then are completely opposite in their thought processes. Aliya is very independent , daring and cool. Obviously she smokes , drinks etc etc. Gualti is a little emotional , soft and compromising types. He does all sorts of stuff for her , no matter what! Aliya applies for a course is Australia without consulting anybody and declares at the last moment that she is going. Gulati is shocked and hurt and pleads her. But she does not listen , so he has to give in. She says that they need this “Break” in order to find themselves. And then she is off to Australia and enjoying herself , whereas Gulati feels the pinch always. Finally , he ends up at Australia concerned about her and she shouts at him to leave her alone. They “Break Up”. From this point onwards , I had a little hope that there would be something happening which will teach Aliya a lesson. But futile hopes. She does not realise and they concentrate on their careers and work. And then finally , one fine day she hears that Gulati is getting married and then comes back and proposes him. And you know what??......... Gulati is still waiting to marry her and accepts........ GOD save me........

Wasted around 70 odd bucks and came home late.

Bungy Jumping at Bloukrans Bridge , Tsitsikamma , South Africa – World’s Highest !!

2011-01-03T07:57:00.000-08:00

And yes , I did it :-). I always wanted to do Sky Diving after seeing some videos of colleagues who did it. But then , I thought Bungy jumping would be a much more tougher task than Sky Diving. I was very inspired to see the video of Booo do this Bungy jumping and when we had planned for this trip , I wanted to do it........ AT ANY COST.

Yes , I was scared and yes there was some inner voice which pulled me back saying.... no need of it. But then , I thought , “If I cannot do it now.... I can NEVER do it. We don’t get these opportunities again and again “. So I thought , I will do it... come what may :-)

Seeing my enthusiasm , R had to agree that he will also try it out. He was not actually so interested in it , but I pushed him saying lets do it.

The day we were about to do the jumping , we drove very quietly to the spot. And I could see that R was very nervous and tried his best not to show it. Surprisingly , I was more confident though I had butterflies in my tummy.

We arrived at the spot and registered ourselves. And then we had a view point where people could see the bungy jumping which was a little far away on the bridge. That sight was breath taking and obviously , our fears doubled. But then , we had already booked it and now backing off means wasting a lot of money. So we didn’t have an option. I kept on counselling my mind that its okay and we can do it. We were a group of around 25 people who were called and made to wear the “belts” kind of things. And then we were off to the bridge walk. We had to walk to the centre of the bridge where we are actually supposed to jump. The bridge walk took away whatever confidence I had till then. It scared the hell out of me and I was left numb by the end of the walk. But , R became more confident after that. My God , I didn’t understand how , but he became the opposite of me and was actually restless to do it first.

Loud music played in order to cheer us and relieve us of the tension and the people who work there , I must really appreciate them for dancing and singing and diverting our attention till the end.

Bro went first and was successful. And then it was me and then was Ravi. I just can’t explain those moments in words. I just prayed to God and tried to be brave and re-iterated to myself that its okay and I will do it. And finally , I did it. And it was the most breath taking experience of my life.

Seeing people who did it in a video or from the far is a completely different experience. And ACTUALLY doing it is a completely different experience. I was a little uncomfortable as I was hanging up-side-down and the only connection was at my toes. The fear that I might fall down any moment was really high. But after everything , I would say that it is a MUST-TO-DO for anybody. AWESOME is the only word I can get out of my mouth after it :-).

Welcome 2011 !!!

2011-01-03T07:53:00.000-08:00

It’s finally the end of another year. We are entering a new decade as well as a new year.

Its time to summarise what all happened in 2010 and what would be my resolutions and thoughts for the new year.

Year 2010 :
1. I had celebrated our first anniversary of talking on phone for the first time :-)
2. And then I celebrated our first anniversary of meeting up for the first time :-)
3. And then we finally celebrated our FIRST ANNIVERSARY!!! :-)
4. Work wise , it was a very tough year. I had lots of challenges. I won some and I lost some. But finally all of them were experiences.
I worked my A** out on Alphanumeric which a superb learning. But then , the biggest Jhatka I got was in the form of my appraisal. I learnt to deal with disappointments and fought against odds for my personal satisfaction. If I saw the best managers in 2009 , I saw the worst lott in 2010. I am glad I did. Though I struggled , it was all a learning.
5. Personally , it was a very good year. Obviously , it was a roller coaster ride but then it was not painful. It was fun :-) !!
6. We saw many many places in SA.
7. I got used to my little home in San Marino so much that I don’t want to leave it now :-(
8. I became quite a good cook with people giving me good feedback on my cooking.
9. I played cricket for the first time in an office tournament.
10. My parents came visiting us and we had great fun. I didn’t except that they would really turn up in SA .
11. I became a proud owner of an IPod Touch :-) - A gift from my brother.
12. I did the World’s highest Bungy Jumping at Bloukrans Bridge at Tsitsikamma on the way to Cape Town.

Resolutions for Year 2011 :
1. I want to become a regular to Gym and concentrate more on health.
2. I want to become a regular to Pranayaamam.
3. Think Positive and Stop Crying for each and everything.
4. Become more independent in all terms. Start doing everything by myself instead of depending on “R” for most of them.
5. Spending some time for myself everyday apart from the normal chores at home and work at Office.
6. Learn more and more about cooking and become a better one.

Letters over Emails

2010-12-07T03:29:00.000-08:00

Long gone are the days when people used to wait for the postman to come and drop off letters at our nearby Postbox. Long gone are the days when we used to buy yellow postcards and blue colour inland letters. Long gone are the days when we used to collect foreign stamps and show them to everybody proudly.

Long gone are the days when I used to buy nice flowery envelopes and sheets in “Archies Gallery” to write a message to somebody.

Sadly , now our world remains with electronic mails :-(.

Personally, I feel that there is no “Human Touch” to an Email.I prefer writing letters rather than emails. I love the handwriting in those letters and would prefer people to send me letters over emails , atleast once in a while. I have treasured my childhood letters that I got from various people. The joy that I get when I see a past letter is very very different from the feeling I have when I read a previous email.

My first letter to my husband was also a handwritten letter. And now it remains one of his priced possessions :-) !!

Believe me............. Its really different !!

Diwali – The Festival of Lights – Always my Favourite !!

2010-12-06T04:22:00.000-08:00

There is something in a “Deepam” or “Diya” or a “Oil Lamp” which attracts me :-)

I have been a fan of it since my childhood and my mood automatically radiates when I see bright diyas anywhere. I go to the temple , mainly to light these deepams and stand there staring at them. I must say that the TamilNadu temples look much more good than Andhra temples. And they give lots of importance to Deepams. Only in Tamil Nadu , I have seen people selling these oil lamps which the devotees can light in the temple. Simple , you need not be prepared and take it from home. They are readily available :-).

Before Marriage , for Diwali , I made it a point to put up some kind of Rangoli at home and then decorate them with as many deepams as possible. And then , I spent the rest of the festival just staring away to glory at them. I fall in love with them and I capture those perfect moments in my mind forever.

After marriage , in JoBurg , I hardly thought that I could make my Diwali so colourful as I was not sure if people would allow us and all that. But my two years of Diwali till now have been equally colourful and bright :-).

My mom keeps telling me that she also lights a lamp on behalf of me whenever and to whichever place she goes and remembers me fondly. Such is my love for lights :-) !!

No matter what , I will continue to light lamps for any occasion the whole of my life. I find God in them and I find peace and Divinity in them !!

Sunrise at North Cliff

2010-12-05T07:59:00.000-08:00

A week back , we had gone to view the sunrise at a place called North Cliff in JoBurg, which is quite near to our place. We had been planning this from a long long time. Finally could make it. I was very happy. But the challenging part was........ getting up and reaching the place by 5 AM.Thankfully we made it before the sunrise and the sun came up at around 5:15. What a sight!! Life is so beautiful and God is so wonderful !! :-)

My heart is beating fast.........my heart is beating fast....

2010-12-05T07:36:00.000-08:00

I am always nervous even if I know that I am right and I am fighting for my right. It has not been easy....... not at all easy.......because I am not comfortable talking to new people and in a way I am tired of re-iterating the same issue again and again. All in Vain! Nobody seems to see sense in my argument at all. Even after the case is so clean , nobody seems to see any sense in what I say....... and nobody seems to acknowledge anything.

I guess I am the stupid idiot fighting for this. If it was anybody else , may be they would not have fought for so long............ but I chose not to keep quiet. And I chose to shout out loud.......... no matter what !

But then its a struggle you know.......... its not that easy.......... unfortunately ! :-(

My appraisal. My manager has been quite a good guy though I don’t approve many of his mannerisms and all that. He has always appreciated my passion towards work. My mind knew that he has a good impression on me or atleast thinks that I am out of the crowd. But the way he behaved when it came to my appraisal......... I didn’t expect it at all. I had a discussion with him and he quickly told me that he gave me a ECC but my Level2 manager has changed it without even asking him. And he told me to send him a mail with all the appreciations etc and said that he would fight on my behalf. And I like a little ignorant fool did whatever he wanted and kept reminding him of the issue. He insisted that he wanted a reply from J and will wait for it. Though I knew it was a futile effort , I kept quiet.......... just because he was trying to fight on my behalf. But then , he gave me the greatest jolt of my life. Suddenly one day , he just replied saying that ECC is given to extremely and exceptionally good people and may be I need to do a little more in terms of blah blah blah which he already commented in my appraisal that he is impressed about the same blah blah blah.

Thats it. He just sent this mail and kept quiet. He knew he was contradicting himself , but still chose to do it and left my side in such a horrible way. He didn’t even speak to me about it. Though he knew that somebody else has overrided his decision , he still chose to keep silent. I know why........... because he didn’t want to take it to the next level and spoil his relationship with people. He chose to compromise on his morals and ethics but he didn’t chose to compromise on his relationship with J. Knowing what kind of a guy he is, I just want to ask one question............ doesn’t his conscious prick him for doing this ?

If I were in his place , irrespective of what would happen to me , I would have fought for the right of my subordinate who deserved it. And more than anything , I would have been eager to know what was the reason for changing it when I myself feel that she is an ECC candidate.

I am still fighting for my right and have escalated this to various levels. Nobody seems to even acknowledge that something is definitely wrong except for one person. But ofcourse things were not in his hands either.

Even after having so many appreciation mails and even after working so hard for one year and even after getting ECC from my direct supervisor , why do I have to go through all this ?

Dedicated to Tejaswee Rao

2010-11-26T14:32:00.000-08:00

Her Blog Link : http://blabberblah.wordpress.com/

Its very strange how I got to know about Tejaswee and her life. Last Friday , I was just browsing through random blogs in Google and through somebody else’s blog ( I don’t even remember whom ) , I came to this blog which was kind of unique. I was flattered by the first post “A Letter to the Future”. And then I could not stop myself from reading her entire blog. Little did I expect that she is no more now. It left a deep impact in my heart that day.

Its really true that our life is so uncertain. When we get up in the morning, we don’t even know whether we will come back to the same bed that we got up. This blog of TJ (like her friends call her) left a really deep impact in my heart. And the fact that she is no more and the fact that it all happened in damn 10 to 12 days really startled me. God give strength to her family and friends to cope with the loss.

I spent 2 whole days reading her blog and then further found links to her mother and friends blogs. It was really good reading about all their experiences. TJ was an animal lover and wanted to adopt a child in the future. She spread optimism and laughter wherever she was. Her thoughts are really divine.

I took one resolution that day.......... that I will always continue blogging. In future, even if I am no more, my dear ones can always treasure my blog and my writings............ just the way Tejaswee is still alive because of her blog :-)

Rest in Peace Tejaswee......... I really wish I had known you before. I dedicate this post to you and all your dear ones who are coping with your absence.

Why do we always need to fight for the correct things to happen ?

2010-11-01T06:38:00.000-07:00

“Rules are meant to be broken”. I am fed up of this phrase..... seriously......

It may not be “Rules” , but don’t people have “Morals and Ethics” ? Don’t their conscious prick them when they do something like cheating people or using the allowances provided to them for their own convenience?

I know I pose lots of questions and my thoughts seldom have a full stop. But I can’t help it. I just cant help getting annoyed with all the “S***T” that keeps happening.

Let me give you an example..... “A Pension Clerk”. Does he understand the criticality or the sensitivity of his job ? How many people who sit on the customer facing side of the Pensions Department in India have the dedication to get things done on time? How many of them understand the sensitivity of the issue and how many of them understand the emotions and the needs attached to each and every Pension Case that comes to them? How many of them really feel .......“let me do my best to bring smiles on at least some of them on time” ? They need not do something extra-ordinary for this. They just need to do their job right..... that’s all is the DEMAND. But Alas! Not many people can fulfil this too. What a shame!

Taking Office stationery home and using office benefits for personal purposes. And when it comes to claims , I just don’t need to elaborate. Its the will and wish of the people who claim and the people approve it. The people who work hard hardly get recognised. They know he deserves it , but still deny it. And there is nobody to explain this unfair thing. All they needed to do was think with their minds and hearts ON. I guess “Honesty and Sincerity” have lost their real sense long back. I can show infinite such examples everyday........ everywhere ! You can compromise on anything but not on the “RIGHT” things right?

Why do we always need to fight for the right things to happen ? Everybody is hell-bent on bending the rules and laws in their own will and wish ! Is there nobody who can stop this ? X-(

My heart just cries out loud :-( !!

After a very very long time...............

2010-10-19T05:26:00.000-07:00

Its been ages since I tried to blog..........partly because I was pre-occupied with so much other stuff in my life !! It has been more than an year in Johannesburg now and more than three years in Wipro :-) and more than an year married ! Quite a big deal!

So many things have changed in the past one year.....I spent one successful year in Testing and now I am again back to my own stream SAP Support. Didn’t really think that it would be possible.... but finally managed it..... Thanks to my managers and some amount of luck as well.

South Africa is a beautiful place except the concerns on security and stuff like that. Cannot walk freely on the streets and have to be cautious on what places to visit etc. Apart from that , really enjoyed the beauty of this country and my sweet little home in San Marino........got so much attached to it and just don’t feel like leaving it...... after all my first home.... or should I say our ( Ravi& Me) first sweet little home.

Learnt so many things after leaving my parents and my home in Hyderabad. First of all , learnt how lucky I was staying with my parents all along. Amma would do everything for me and I would still complain that things are not right..... but now.... I have a home of my own and I should take care of it....... Wow!!l Looks Wow.... but when I actually got into it , understood the difficulty.... hahahaha...
As a woman , working as well as trying to manage my home has been quite challenging. Though Ravi doesnot have too many demands at home , its difficult to convince myself that I am not able to do everything that a “Dharam Patni” shoud ideally do :-). I love arranging my home , keeping it neat and clean and above all , I love cooking for my husband. Ravi says , not required. But its hard to convince myself :-).

Arey haan , “I love cooking for my husband” se yaad aayaaa......... there is huge change in the perception after marriage you know. I forget thinking about what I like and I always end up thinking of what Ravi likes. If I am in a vegetable shop , I look around for veggies and fruits which are Ravi’s favs. Aloo is Ravi’s favourite....... so I end up making aloo sabji in different ways very frequently. Its like you have lost yourself literally but found yourself in your family’s joy. If I am like this now..... then God only should know how I will change when I have kids :-).

With Ravi , it had always been like being with a friend on par rather than with a husband who is supposed to be superior. May be because of the very less age difference between us , or because we are colleagues as well. I have always imagined a married life with a person who is more powerful than me , more superior to me in age , experience and everything and I just listening to him...... very filmy right ;-) But it was never that way with Ravi. Yes , he is superior in his thoughts and very very matured when it comes to supporting me in my thick and thin , but always on par giving me the prime importance and the freedom I needed.

Hmm.... now since I have again started posting things , I guess I will be blogging frequently.I am actually not practising any of my so-called hobbies which now remain just on papers :-(. I brought my violin when I went to India in March , but didn’t get to lay hands on it till today. Guess I should take out more time for myself !!

25th June 2009 : Two Years In Wipro!!!!

2009-06-24T21:04:00.000-07:00

What a journey it has been :-) !!!!

Two years back…………after we just wrote our engineering exams , I got my joining date at Wipro. Training at Bangalore and Posting at Hyderabad. And I am the only person from my entire batch to have my training at Bangalore. All the others got their training location too, at Hyderabad.

Phew!!!……Bangalore…..an unknown un-easiness entered my body and mind. Unknown City………new environment………..new people…first time out of my house in my entire life…..and CHANGE , the thing I dread the mostttttt……….Hesitation and restlessness filled my mind and soul for the rest of the day. But there was no option , I had to go. June 25th , 2007 was the joining date at the Electronic City.
Technology : SAP……………Now what is this??……I spelt it together “sap”. Haven’t heard of it before. I knew C , C++ , Java , Unix……but what is this “sap” ?? I typed it in Google and waited to see the results. ERP Software I came to know…………software product integrating the best business practices………

Hmmm….I thought…..Hope I will be able to do well!! :-)

My mother came along with me to find a paying guest accommodation and settle me at Bangalore where my cousin sister stays. Koramangala , National Games Village is the place where we saw the first PG and I said yes instantly………….I somehow liked the place immediately… :-). There were two temples nearby , one Panchamukha Aanjaneya and another Prasanna Ganapathi. The temples looked like heaven and I thought of visiting them every Saturday early morning at 6:00 . The early morning chillness and the flower decorated moorti with illuminating oil diyas!! What a sight – Heaven !!

And then the first day at Office with my new “Id Card”………..an entirely different feeling….But I was alone…….completely alone………There were soo many people in our “sap” batch who knew each other already………were from the same college and some of them , best friends too. The place looked alien to me and it scared the hell out of me. I felt as if I am the only person for whom , all the others were complete strangers. What a challenge!! I have to get along with this entire set of people alone and who knows….. with whom I might end up being friends by the end of these three months… :-) ( Touchwood I made some wonderful friends, for a lifetime !!)

And on the first day of training , all of us got to know that it is not “sap” but “S.A.P” ( Systems Applications and Products). And we were told that , now as we are gonna be SAP professionals , we should never say “sap” and educate people who say so…..not to say so..

I didn’t have the opportunity to interact with many people or rather got lost in the number of min-groups present……….and hence I became a silent observer for the rest of my training. The only work I had or used to do were , concentrate on the training classes and observe the people around me. During the first month , I used to have my lunch alone most of the times and I hated this part. I sweared to myself that I will never allow this to happen to anybody else for the rest of my life! I will never let anybody feel “lonely” or “alone”.

The three months were a roller coaster ride……….and I still find it hard to recognize the roads of Bangalore. Every weekend , I used to go to one of my family friend’s place( same place)….and every time , I used to get lost somewhere or the other. Roaming around the un-known streets of Bangalore, alone, and interacting with the 11 other new people in my PG were the challenging tasks that I used to perform ;-) heheheheheh . Every girl in my PG had a new story to tell everyday and I kept becoming more and more a listener , which is actually against my nature. I learnt about many things in those few months and I also realized how important my past was and my family is, whom I generally tend to take as very very obvious. Indeed , how lucky was I to have such a strong family structure and people to take care of me.

If the first three months at Bangalore was one kind of learning , the rest of the 1 year 9 months at Hyderabad in my first and only project till now is another huge kind of learning. These 21 months at my project were again a mixed bag of experiences and huge learning. I was amongst very nice and knowledgeable people , from whom I learnt all the nuances of work. I learnt how to talk , how to behave , and even how to draft a simple mail. And I will be grateful to my gurus here who taught me all these. It has been a superb experience and I regret that I will have to leave it :-(.

Well , my husband keeps advising me not to get emotionally attached to the people around me. He says , “get attached to the work and not the people. Otherwise , you will only find it difficult” . But, emotion and people are my strength and motivation and will remain so. May be, I might face difficulties because of this , but this IS my way of life!! :D

Oh yeah , I almost forgot :-) . At the completion of two years at Wipro , I have two major achievements in my kitty. One , my professional work getting appreciated and getting an opportunity to lead a team. And the second , an achievement at my personal front. I married a Wiproite recently……….…nope , its not a love marriage !!

I always believe that things happen with a purpose and a reason. I strongly believe in “Destiny”. And this co-incidence makes my belief even more stronger!!

When I was recruited into Wipro at my campus , I and my best buddy got into different companies and we were very unhappy about this as this would have to separate us geographically and ultimately lose touch with each other. I felt even more stupid as I was alone at Bangalore.

But now I get it ;-). My soul mate was hiding here and I had to find him…..hehehehehe
What say Raviiii ?? ;-))))
With all these wonderful and tough experiences , I am gearing up for another BIG CHANGE, professionally and personally. But this time , I am not alone!! :-)

Rice Plate Phenomenon!!!

2009-06-18T21:34:00.000-07:00

We rarely understand the other person’s point of view!!

Some days back , I was just changing the channels jet speed in order to find some interesting stuff to watch at a very late hour of the day. It was a Saturday and as usual I was completely bored and sleep said a no-no…

Something caught my attention…..it said “Das kahaaniyaan” and atlast I was curious…
It was a movie…..a collection of short stories………each story conveyed a point….some basic “gyaan” of life I thought…..
In this collection was a short story called “Rice Plate” acted by Shabana Azmi and Naseeruddin Shah!! Shabana Azmi was an orthodox Brahmin Lady and was traveling from her town to her cousin’s place I guess. In the railway station , he goes to the canteen and buys herself a rice plate.She puts at one of the benchces provided and goes to get herself some water. When she comes back , she finds Naseeruddin Shah , a muslim old man eating the rice plate. She gets furious on seeing him and sits opposite to him. The guy though startled at her behaviour continues eating. She gets really furious and starts eating from the same plate that he is eating. Finally the guy gives up and surrenders the plate to her and leaves. She finishes eating triumphantly and when she is about to leave , she sees another un-touched rice plate in just the adjacent bench. Then she realizes her mistake.

This is what happens to most of us. We tend to look at things from only our perspective.
I don’t blame anybody for this. It is perfectly human :-)
From our eyes , it might look like a square. But the same thing might look like a rectangle to some others!!
But I guess , the only people who stand out , are the ones who understand the other person’s point of view. To be able to put ourselves in the shoes of others and understand their reactions , is what that makes life challenging and meaningful!!

Now………….this, is not as easy as I just wroteeeeeee!!! Heheheheh

Yee Rishtaa Kyaa kehlaata hai!!

2009-04-11T20:11:00.000-07:00

April 4th , 2009 : It is exactly one month since we got married!!

The red sindhoor at the tip of my hair , the bangles and especially the long mangalasutra (which comes out and grabs my attention whenever I bend down)…………all of them remind me every now and then that there is another person in my life , who is as important as myself to me.

The last one month has been the most mind blowing experience of my life!

Right from the settling of the marriage till Ravi going back to Jo’Burg…..everything was just like some fairy tale…………some movie clipping………

We kept reminding each other of the fact that we are married now , for almost 15 days after the D-day………..Pataa nahin yaar……..digest karnaa bahut mushkil thaaa…..hehehehe………..

Two of the many incidents which confirmed that I am a married girl now, mentally, are:

Incident no 1:

This happened on March 17^th……the day Ravi went back to Jo’Burg……

Ravi went for some shopping and left his phone at home. One of his colleague from Jo’Burg called up…..

The conversation went on this way….

Other person : I am X calling from Jo’Burg….can I speak to Ravi?

Me: Ravi forgot his cellphone at the house. He has gone for some shopping…. Do you want to leave a message for him…

Other person : May I know who is speaking?

Me : I am his wife speaking (Without even thinking for a second. As if it was very very usual and I am saying it for the infineth time.)

Other person : Oh ok…Congratulations!!

Can you believe this…………..

I am sure the person who spoke to me would have gone crazy as to how this girl, who just married Ravi , seemed so usual already?

I am still wondering as to how that sentence just came out of my mouth so spontaneously………….

The paradox was……we were still struggling to get used to the fact that we are married……and suddenly this sentence comes out of my mouth so spontaneously, without even giving a pause…….Strange!!

Does this mean………..I have accepted the fact sub-consciously? ;-) Heheheh

Incident no 2:

I have always felt that my mother’s role is a very enjoyable one, as she has her husband and kids whom she can depend on. Incase of an argument , she cleverly switches sides…..sometimes towards the children, blaming her husband……and sometimes towards her husband, blaming her children………….

I used to be very envious of this thing that she enjoyed.............

Two weeks back , a similar kind of thing happened. We had an argument at home and suddenly my mother changed the side , and started complaining to my father that I am not responsible etc etc…….

My instant reaction to that:

“ Not only you , even I have a person to complain now!!”

( Did I really say this?? Did I?? Did I?? )

That’s it !! My mother was shocked and my father could not stop laughing……

He said to my mother…….”Yeah she is right. If you have your husband to complain about her, now she has her husband to complain about you. Simple!!”

I kept thinking the whole day , again , as to how did this sentence come out of my mouth without my notice.

The same question again…….. “Have I already accepted the fact sub-consciously?”

Obviously , the answer is “Yes”(true to my innerself). Ofcourse my outer ego will never agree to this ;-)

Today we celebrate the completion of one month of our married life , in which we have been together for two weeks and we have been very far away from each other for the next two weeks( Doesn’t it seem too small for the build-up that I have given above…..hehehehe…..anyways…..leave it)

I carry a mixed bag of experiences regarding the last one month……….happiness , excitement , disappointment , sadness , neutralness etc etc etc………...everything………

But yeah one thing……….

Yee Rishtaa Kyaa Kehlaata Hai??

Dheeree Dheeree Samajh Mein Aa Rahaa Hai!! :-)

BLACK – The Colours Of Life!!

2009-01-26T08:34:00.000-08:00

It has been exactly one year since my visit to Sphoorti for the first time.
And today is my brother’s birthday too !!
Again , we planned to go to Sphoorti , and excitedly bought many things to give to the children. But things did not happen as decided. I spoke to Srivyal in the morning and was very disappointed to hear that the children went to school and will not be back before 1 PM in the afternoon.

So , I called up Kranthi and she told me another place to visit.
DevNar Blind School , Begumpet !!

Really really glad that we could get an opportunity to go there today. It was again a very very different feeling which can be just experienced and probably cant be expressed in words.

By the time I, my brother and my cousin bother went there , they were preparing for a flag hoisting. The children had just finished their breakfast and were getting ready for the assembly. It was a different kind of an experience meeting those children.

In sphoorti , we saw children who were abandoned by their parents or couldnot be fed by their poor families. But , today , here , we saw , physically challenged children. Even these children stay together in a hostel and study, away from their parents. But the only difference is, they donot not know any other colour except, BLACK !!

Still , there was so much enthusiasm in them. Even though , they were really unfortunate and in pain , they did not complain. They were soo happy together yaar !!

Today , I realized the power of TOUCH !! I was just roaming around talking to all the children to get acquainted to them. I was really touched. I met a small child , who was just passing by me. I just bent down, touched his hand and said “Hello , how are you?? “.
Suddenly, the grip tightened . And he answered enthusiastically , “ Hiiiiii , I am fine “.
And we had a lovely 10 min conversation. By the end of the conversation , he almost embraced me completely and was not ready to go for the assembly.

Mere bahut samjhaanee see , he went back . But he kept coming back again and again to get a feel of me. That I am still there !!

I really don’t have more words to explain further. We HAVE to do something for the abandoned. There is every need to make the depressed feel WANTED.

Next time , if anyone of you happen to visit a children’s home , just give a child a tight hug , and then tell me your after thoughts !!

It would be a pleasure to listen to your experiences!! :-)

Arranged Marriages…….

2009-01-25T04:06:00.000-08:00

I have always believed in love after marriage rather than marriage after love!!
I have always belived that , to build a relationship , we need to invest good amount of time and effort !! And things will happen gradually !!

May be that’s one of the reasons why….I chose to go for an arranged marriage……though I would have really liked to marry a person who is one of my good friends. Or rather I would say…..I would have loved to marry a person whom I am comfortable with. But , I did not find a person so close to my heart that I would marry him.. :-)
So , the real reason is , I don’t think I was left with any other option… ;-) Ha Ha

A cute Ad (Tea Ad) comes to my mind when I think of arranged marriages:
A lovely definition and description of an arranged marriage!!

A Daughter-in-law keeps talking to her mother-in-law and father-in-law, while having tea.
Daughetr-in-law: Mummyji , was yours a love marriage or an arranged marriage??
Mother-in-law : Bahuuuuuu , ofcourse Love Marriage !!
Daughter-in-law : Kyaa?? Sacchii??
Mother-in-law: Jub uskii baraat hamaare ghar ke saamne khadi thi , ham logon ne ek doorsee ko dekhaaa…. Aur pehlii nazar mein pyaar hogayaa…..huyee na love marriage !!

And everybody end up laughing!!

Very true!! In all senses , this is what happens in an arranged marriage. The person is a stranger to you , till you get married. And after you are married, he/she becomes your LIFE :-) !! Hain naa interesting?? ;-))

But , on a serious note , arranged marriages are a real gamble yaar!! You will remain completely clueless about the person whom you are going to get married to and the life that is going to exist between the both of them.
From a girls’s perspective , the things that come to our mind , when we opt for an arranged marriage are:
-- How would it feel to marry a person whom we hardly know?
-- How would it feel to realize that rest of our life depends a person whom our parents are gonna get us married to?

The questions seem a little serious eh?? Well they are!!……. But my mother says…that this is a natural feeling that every girl goes through , when she is about to get married…………

TEEN SUICIDES!!

2008-04-28T19:56:00.000-07:00

You know what the cover strory of this month’s India Today is……
TEEN SUICIDES….and the study says that the percentage has dangerously increased by a very huge amount during the recent years.

India tops the charts in TEEN SUICIDES…….I was suddenly taken aback…..what the hell!!…..India tops the charts!!!...How surprising was that??…….Previously , it was the US that has topped in teen suicides and crime. Is this called as “being cool” or “westernizing” ?? Where is India heading to in the near future?? It is a real big question mark…..

The main causes for teen suicide as in the survey conducted are :
1) Parental pressure to perform well in the acads.
2) Inability to cope with disappointments and failures.

And above all, parents don’t have an inkling or the slightest clue about their children’s depression or suicidal tendencies…………SIXER!!!

90% of the suicide notes have their childrem apologizing to their parents for not being able to perform well….”sorry baba, I let you down”…..”Sorry appa,I failed in the exam.I cant show my face to you again”……….”amma I am not able to take any more pressure”……”I QUIT”.

Can anyone understand how depressing and helpless these notes are !!!

Why doesnt the parents give their children breathing space?Why cant they just leave them alone?Why does every parent in the world want their child to get the number ONE mark always? As said in Taree Zameen par……..Har maa baap ko avval number kaa bacchaa hi kyon chaahiyeee??… bakee ke bacchhon kaa kyaa haal hoga?

It is very very annoying that the parents don’t have the slightest clue that their children are under such mental pressure. Why doesn’t a father speak like a friend to his son and find out what his son’s actual thoughts are? Why don’t the children have the right to think innovatively?If all the people become software engineers and doctors , who will take up a career in other fields.

Adolescence is such a delicate stage of life for any human-being.Why doesn’t the parents feel the responsibility to handle their children with care and counsel them properly. Do they have to dictate their children’s future just because they have given birth to them?Why cant they guide their children properly when they need it the most?Why is there such a huge gap between a child and a parent that the child would find “DYING” easier than confronting their parents………..

I have the greatest fear that all these questions will remain un-answered.!!

Love is Universal!!

2008-04-21T08:33:00.000-07:00

Recently , I happened to watch a wonderful movie…. Gamyam…..Though I feel that the director was only 70% percent successful in conveying what the story writer wanted to express , the story, dialogues and what was wanted to be conveyed were simple SUPERB!!

There is particular scene in the movie which I loved and it brought tears into my eyes.
The hero is always at the back of a girl who is a medico and keeps moving in various camps from one place to another providing medical help to the common people.I should say that she works at the grass root level , SERVING people.

The hero is a rich kid who was brought with only the riches in the world and nothing else.
He is always at the back of the girl roaming to whatever place she goes claiming that he loves her very much and he is wanting the same from her.

One day when both of them were walking on the road, a lady comes up to them along with her new born baby thanking the heroine for her medical help during her delivery and asks the hero who was beside her to bless her baby showing lots of love and gratitude towards them. This arrogant guy shoos her off rudely and says that he is sick of such an cheap and a poor environment. For that, the girl asks him only one question.

Heroine( to the hero): Can you really take love if it is given??
Hero : Of course and it is the only reason I am behind you from so many days( wanting your love).
Heroine : That lady tried to give love to you. But you had hurt her feelings by shooing her off rudely. Can you really take love if it is given??
Hero : Don’t be silly. I don’t need that lady’s love. I need your love. That lady does not mean anything to me. I don’t need to show her love.
Heroine : That’s the biggest mistake you are making. Love is universal . How can you love me when you are not able to reciprocate to the love that the lady has expressed??

HOW TRUE!! I was completely bowled over by this. Really , Love is universal. How can you love a particular person when you are not able to love the people around you. Is the love that you show to your family different from the love you show to a neighbor? Though you might not know that person , atleast you could reciprocate wishing her good luck which would have been so good to her .

Who says that movies don’t teach us anything. It is such a powerful medium. As long as we have the right people who could built up such superb movies , there is so much that could be shown on the silver screen which could influence the thought process of thousands of people.

Sphoorti-A Way of living!!

2008-03-07T06:52:00.000-08:00

Recently I visited a home for the orphan kids…Sphoorti foundation.It was really the most thought provoking and joyful day of my life.

I joined a community called Santhwana in orkut and through this found out that there is an organization which takes up the responsibility of the abandoned kids.When asked whom should we give more importance for the development of the country , I would definitely say that the concentration should be on children because they are the future of our country. Every child is special and has the full right of studying and going to greater heights in their lives. What an opportunity it would be to help an organization that takes up the responsibility of abandoned and orphan kids like a mother.

Initially I was hesitant about how to approach the organization without knowing anybody there and all that.But better late than never , Santhwana had organized a meal for those kids and spending half a day with them.And believe me , the response from the kids was amazing.Though they don’t know you, they coming running to you and welcome you into their small world with utmost love. How haeartless are those parents who did not care to think a moment before leaving their children!! And that too, these lovely kids who are the fresh buds ready to blossom. What a blessing it would be to be a part of such and organization and help small children.

Here is an introduction of the organization
SPHOORTI is a simple grassroots organization working for underprivileged children - homeless, orphaned, abandoned and other at-risk groups.
Children at SPHOORTI are in our complete care and custody and we are committed to impacting their lives 24x7, 365 days a year.
SPHOORTI was established in Aug 2006 with 3 children. We are currently supporting 45 children at our Home in Hyderabad and in addition, we sponsor education of 9 other children.

For more information you can visit its site.
http://www.sphoorti.org/
(Its founder is Srivyal Vuyyuri who did his masters in Economics and came back to fulfill his dream) .

The Kids are really lovely.I went with one of my friends on Republic day and took small flags along with me to pin them up on people who are interested.
Jab maine poochaa ki kis kis ko flags chaahiye…..sab doudke chalee aayee meree pas….and the most surprising and the lovliest part was that they systematically stood in a line while I and my friend were pinning them up.After finishing their turn , they are concerned whether their other friends also have them or not.There were many kids coming back to me with some of their other friends who were shy to come to me.Such unity!! I tneee nanhee nanhee bacchon mein who pyaar aur apnaapan deekhke to mujhe to ronaa hi aayaaa……You will have to experience it to feel it.

And by the time it was time for me to leave, there were many of them who said…. “akka appudee velipotunnaavaaa” . What relation do they have with me to persuade me not to leave. Kyaa sahee maayineee mein pyaar yaheen hai??

At that point , I felt that, if I can be of any use to make a life of atleast one among them , that would be enough.This visit to Sphoorti was really an eye opener. Many of them feel that if they donate money , they are DONE with it. But its not done.I agree that yes,without money we can do nothing. But apart from that , there is a lot more that can be done. There is every need to make the depressed feel wanted.There is every need to spend time with them and love them. I am sure they wont disappoint us.

LOVE!!!

2008-02-23T09:09:00.000-08:00

LOVE….the four lettered word. What meaning does it have….What do you mean by love….many people have tried to define love in their own words and have a perspective of their own about it….but many people have also failed to identify love and have not found any definitions for it…it remains a puzzle for them…

In my opinion….it is wrong to define love…because I don’t think that love has any particular form or definition….Love is the hope with which we live and it is not only the kind of relationship that exists between a male and a female….it has many forms….even friendship is a kind of love….and any kind of a positive feeling can be called as love may be….it is the kind of relationship that exists between a child and a mother…a father and a mother…a brother and a sister and even owner and a servant….

LOVE is a HOPE with which we move forward in LIFE.

The most important and the most difficult weekend of my life till now!!

2008-01-22T18:03:00.000-08:00

(Almost 4 months back from now…..suddenly remembered it)
It was one week before I was officially going to complete my training and report at Hyderabad. The study mood has already taken a back seat and everyone had their own plans for the last weekend some of them were going to spend in Bangalore(after which they had report at their base locations).Some of them like me were just sitting day dreaming in the classes. Just the thought of coming back home felt so good.
After a week, there would not be anymore queuing up at the bathroom of the PG , there would not be anymore eating of that oily tasteless breakfast and dinner without a curd , there would not be anymore of spending time alone roaming about the streets of Bangalore with a constant fear of getting lost……
Then came a mail on the eve of Friday(supposedly the most joyful day of the week) which took of the breath of all of us present there.
It said…..that there is going to another re-exam.…..what the hell….how could we get back to the previous syllabus and revise the portions in just 2 damn days…….HEIGHTS OF STUPIDITY…..
Nobody could digest this fact for about an hour……some of them wanted to protest and try to convince the authorities……but all in vain……they had confirmed that come what may…there will be a test and all those who would not clear it are OUT………..wah!!
Now begins the weekend…….
After a lot of convincing from my near and dear…..I finally convinced myself that I indeed had to give up all the excitement that was planned for the weekend and study HARD for the test that is ahead. I cared a damn whether I was IN or OUT…….but just did not want to study that weekend…..that too…..the hell a lot of portion……it was nearly impossible to revise the whole stuff again…..

Saturday:
Morning: I got up early with an intention of settling down to study early……..I went into the bathroom and Volia! NO WATER……..There was no water coming out from the tap.
This fact didn’t disturb me much at that point of the time as I had a HOPE that it will be normal in an hour or soo…I started studying…
It was actually Vinaya chaturthi that day. What a day to start with….huhhhh……All the girls in the PG kept waiting and the water didn’t turn up till 11 . Then I had to pack up and go to my cousin sister’s house atleast to take a damn bath that day( Actually I didn’t go to her place for the pooja as I wanted to study for the test)…..But finally ganapati pappa wanted me there……By the time I went to my sis’s place and a had a bath it was 1 in the afternoon. Almost half a day was over and I had not moved a bit in my preparation for the most important exam I had to take…….ramjaaneeee

After lunch….my sister had some work and the whole family left the house all by myself. Finally, I began my serious preparation and didn’t look up at the watch till 6 in the evening. At that time , my sis called up and asked me to light the diya at the ganesh as they were getting late. Again I looked up at the watch at 8 and this time the doorbell rang. My sis told me that we had to go for dinner to another relatives’ home and by the time we were back..it was past 11.
That’s it of the day………..
Sunday…

I got up early and read for sometime and then I realized that I needed internet for sometime to refer some other material and take some mock tests. I came back to my PG at around 12(God….The clock ticks soooo fast….huhhh) and then had to take a Xerox for some material for a friend of mine who was not well and asked me for a favour. By the time I was done with the Xerox it was already 2:30(delay at the Xerox shop….as usual).So I requested another friend of mine to give off the Xerox .I packed my bags and left for another family friend of ours. I started studying again after 4 in the evening…

I just did not understand whether that preparation was sufficient or not but could not do anything about it. The most hectic weekend of my life which I thought would be the most joyful weekend in Bangalore.

ALVIDA 2007!!!

2008-01-03T23:32:00.000-08:00

We are coming to the fag end of a fantastic year…….may be it is time for us to think about what has happened to us this year….and learn from our experiences…..keeping the process of learning going on……

One of my greatest achievements this year is MY BLOG…. And the inspiration for me to create it is one of my friends(Revanth)….I started it in February .Its only a month away from its birthday…. J .I have already celebrated the first birthday of my cell in november……whenever you get time to party…just do it….because you can never get back these days…make the most out of it…..

But the saddest part of this year is…that many of my friends are not with me….its a great feeling to complete our engg this year……but it feels equally bad to part with some of my best friends who have always been with me through my thick and thin…..not that they wont be there now…but life has to go on….we keep meeting new people and our interests keep transitioning….…..It feels nostalgic when I remember the numerous moments we spent together…..those happy days…..which can never come back….

But I made three great(new) friends this year and I will treasure the moments I spent with them during my training days in Wipro Bangalore.Its a very nostalgic feeling. This year, I also bid bye bye to the traditional class room lectures and entered into an “EMPLOYEE” phase of my life and became a member of the “SALARIED CLASS”. In the second half of the year, every day was a new challenge ahead of me and every day made me learn some of the very important lessons of life. The time I spent in Bangalore(for my training) is really very very valuable I should say. Though I will term it as the most difficult phase of my life till now , I got an opportunity to realize how comfortably I led the previous phase of my life. Got an opportunity to realize the importance of “parents” whom we generally tend to take as very very obvious. Realised the huge amount of role they play in our lives and with this I also realized my responsibility towards them.

Finally, a lovely GOOD BYE to a great , fantastic and a very crucial year of my life- 2007!! (with the HOPE of another fabulous year ahead :-) ).

MRS SUDHA MURTHY-THE ONE AND ONLY INSPIRATION OF MY LIFE TILL NOW!!

2007-11-22T22:09:00.000-08:00

Now what should I say about this lady who inspired me so much. Actually this blog is not enough to tell you people about the happenings of her life and the way she inspired me. But, just wanted to give her a place in my blog.

Just one look at her and you will realize that simplicity is the way of her life and living.
Her numerous experiences which she has penned down teach the basic values and morals of life. Her writing is not very sophisticated , but the underlying aura and meaning are great.

For the people who need an introduction of her, she is the wife of the chief founder of Infosys , Mr Narayan murthy. But , she is no longer called as Naranyan Murthy’s wife. She has an identity of her own. She is the chief founder of Infosys foundation which is a charitable organization and she has adopted villages together in the interiors of Karnataka and provided food for them. She manages more than 25 orphanages. She has written many books which convey her real life experiences and what she has learnt from them. Her book , Mahasweta which is originally written in kannada has brought a transition in the way of thinking of people. This book is about a wife and husband in which the wife is affected with a skin disease called luekoderma. At her time, she was the only lady engineer from her department and she is the first women employee to work on the shop floor of Telco.Her experiences with Mr JRD Tata are mind blowing and it was in Telco that she met a kannada guy(Narayan Murthy) and later married him.

She helped her husband with the first amount of capital for Infosys and took care of the family needs till Infosys took a shape. She loved programming and very much wanted to assist her husband in managing Infosys. But, Narayan murthy thought otherwise and told her that only one of them could take up the responsibility of Infosys. At first , she was devastated at her husband’s decision. But later on , she gave it a thought and realized that her husband was right. If both of them got involved with the company , then who will take care of the family. She opted to become a home-maker and she describes this as the most painful sacrifice which she had to give to fulfill her husband’s dream. But , she says that everyone should have their own individuality and thinking. Though she is a home-maker now , she did not stop thinking and I really wonder what was the inspiration for her to start Infosys foundation.

Just read some of her books or articles and you will know why I am so impressed by her. As a woman, I take a lot of inspiration from her!!

The Namesake!!

2007-10-17T07:47:00.000-07:00

This novel has a concept which is closely related to situations and consequences which I have faced and keep facing sometimes even now. But the only difference is that, I love my name. Though it is different, though people make fun of it now and then, I just love my name. Unlike the character in the novel named Gogol who always makes a mistake of hating his name(and thus losing his identity and realizes it in the end),sometimes I am just proud of my name. Though it is a little frustrating when my teacher always stops at my name(while taking attendance) with a very helpless look on her face, it is a great feeling when I find that there is only one PURNA KOUMUDI in this world as of now…..

I have learnt to take pleasure in teaching people how to pronounce my name properly every time in a very patient manner and I take great pride in dictating the spelling of my name to all my teachers, especially English teacher…hahahaha….. all of them obediently writing it down as I dictate….

The novel has stirred up some of the memories of the incidents which even I have faced in my life. Definitely you are identified by your name, but your true identity lies in what kind of a person you are and not what kind of a name you have. Depending on your personality, your name which was ridiculed earlier may be loved and appreciated later. In the novel, Gogol never tries to find out why his father had named him so and changes his name to Nikhil. Finally he realizes that he could not do justice to either Gogol or Nikhil. He remains somewhere in the middle totally messing up with himself.

Finally, a great novel which has lots to learn about where your true identity lies.

An interesting Conversation!!

2007-10-11T08:29:00.000-07:00

This is an interesting conversation which I had with Suhas. I had a certain opinion about God which I was never able to express properly. But, this conversation gave me an opportunity to redefine myself and my views on God.

Now, before showing you the conversation, I would like to introduce you to my Suhas who is my collegue in Wipro and a great techy. We usually call him Suhasipedia as he is that intelligent and with due respect, he has his opinions about the existence or the non-instence of god and we always used to have long discussions about it when we had free time during our training.

After we have reported at our respective posting locations, both of us were killing time chatting on the instant messenger. The conversation goes on like this…

(We have our salary credited to SBI and he was sharing some of the idiotic incidences which took place with some of our collegues..thanks to the great SBI…huhhh)

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:25 AM]:

SBI Case 1: One of my friends went to a retail store and swiped his SBI card. The transaction slip didnt come out. As a result the cashier swiped it twice and the money got deducted twice. The store has already writted to SBI, but SBI is not returning the money.

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:26 AM]:

hahahaha.......

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:26 AM]:

oh god.....its unbelievable..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:26 AM]:

hey, wait a bit... the more unbelievable stuff abt SBI is coming up.

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:28 AM]:

SBI, Case 2: the same friend's classmate had the foll problem. She had not taken the SBI loan, so she should not have been having deduction of 750/- from her salary. She went once and saw it was deducted. So she spoke to Tedweb and they ensured she got the money back. She checked after a few days and again 750/- was cut by SBI. Again Tedweb told them to roll it back and they did it.

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:28 AM]:

Then what happened is great

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:28 AM]:

She checked it after a few days and she found that SBI was cutting 750/- EVERY DAY!!!

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:29 AM]:

oh god!!

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:29 AM]:

hopeless people...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:29 AM]:

Wait! She went to SBI branch and the manager gave him her number and ensured she got back her money. He also gave her his number and told her to call him up for any further problems

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:29 AM]:

And now comes the best part:

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:29 AM]:

hmm...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:30 AM]:

When she got back home, she found that the money was returned, but now SBI was cutting 750/- rupees EVERY HOUR!

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:30 AM]:

serious??

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:30 AM]:

And the manager didnt even pick up the phone when she called. Before they corrected the situation her account balance was negative some lakhs!

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:30 AM]:

oh god.......this is hopeless...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:30 AM]:

Dead serious. This is a true story, worthy of going into Ripley's Believe It Or Not!

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:31 AM]:

Wait, there's one more true story.

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:31 AM]:

oh...disgusting,.,,

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:31 AM]:

SBI, Case 3: Another classmate of the same friend went to his ATM and checked his balance. It came out to -72000!

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:31 AM]:

SBI: Pure Idiocy, and Nothing Else!

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:32 AM]:

Enjoyed?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:32 AM]:

oh god....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:32 AM]:

yeah enjoyed...hehehhe

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:32 AM]:

Oh, and the girl in the second case, whose account was being cut every hour, had to shift to Hyd in a couple of days. Now imagine her situation

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

papam....seriously

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

hmm...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

papam.... means innocent, or bechari, right?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

Yeah..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

i still need to hunt for the internet pin numbers..envelopes..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

they have not yet come for me..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

enjoy the hunt!

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

hmm..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:33 AM]:

SBI will make you run like a horse for it

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:34 AM]:

shit yaar...i just hate it..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

i think..i will keep withdrawing my whole salary and putting it in citibank..every month,..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

thats better

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

U know ,though my salary bank in tedweb is citi bank....i am still getting my salary in sbi

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

i dunnoo why

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

yeah, you'll keep getting it in SBI only

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:35 AM]:

for the first 15 months SBI is the bank you're supposed to use

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:36 AM]:

hmm....

There is another friend of ours ‘Ramgopal’. I call him Ramji and Suhas calls him RG. He is a great astrologer in our group and almost all of us showed our hands to him.I was just cribbing about my hardluck and how I don’t get anything without hardwork and stuff like that and with this started our debate on DESTINY and something called LUCK. Here goes another piece of conversation…

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:49 AM]:

even ramji told me after seeing my hand...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:49 AM]:

that...those who are not worthy than you also...pass off very easily....but u will have to take the path of hardwork...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:50 AM]:

you will get whatever u want in life..but for everything..u will have to work hard...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:50 AM]:

this is what he said..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:50 AM]:

and from the n number of experiences i had..i know that what ramji said is true..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:50 AM]:

the lines in your hand are less important than the curves (of the neurons) in your brain --- Suhas Karnik

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:50 AM]:

hahahah...good one..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:51 AM]:

i will remember this...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:51 AM]:

I honestly believe that, actually

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:51 AM]:

even i am not a very strong believer in all these astrologies and stuff...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:51 AM]:

but when ramji said that...i somehow could connect it to my real life experiences...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:51 AM]:

but i thought you believed in this

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:52 AM]:

hahahah...just to some extent

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:52 AM]:

i believe in destiny..and no HUMAN can decide your destiny….acc to me..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:52 AM]:

Or predict it

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:52 AM]:

ah well, that's natural. whenever someone tells us our "future", its human tendency to try and connect it to what we know is true

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:53 AM]:

may be u are right......but i felt it like that for only this thing which RG said…

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:54 AM]:

exactly... with all due respect, when someone tells you your future, the only thing that registers in your mind is the stuff which has come true... the part which hasn't come true, we ignore

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:54 AM]:

yeah..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:54 AM]:

As Richard Dawkins puts it, the hits are noticed, the misses are ignored.

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:54 AM]:

yeah i know..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

and u know what i believe in...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

well, not exactly

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

you're a very interesting person in your beliefs

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

interesting = confusing (for others)

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

if u ever want something badly......just let it go...if it is destined to you...it will anyway come back....and if it is not for you....then..it is never yours anyway...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:55 AM]:

hahaha.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:56 AM]:

may be..u still need to know me more..thats it..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:56 AM]:

if that is so, then what is the purpose of trying for anything?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:56 AM]:

that is the human tendency involved....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:56 AM]:

when u know that u cant get something..and when u know that it is all u want.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:56 AM]:

u cant help but try for it....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:57 AM]:

but ultimately.....destiny wins

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:57 AM]:

what say?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:57 AM]:

what makes you so confident abt destiny?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:57 AM]:

hmm...a difficult one to answer....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:57 AM]:

because i have many experiences of my own...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:58 AM]:

my mom, actually was talking about destiny a week ago to me and I couldnt help smiling. when my mom asked my why, I told her it was almost exactly what you were saying in Grameen

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:58 AM]:

but the whole summary of it..is what i wrote above....no matter how hard you try for something..if .it is not yours ...u will never get it....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:58 AM]:

what did i say in grameen?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:59 AM]:

i dont rememeber..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:59 AM]:

that all of us meeting up here in blore is destiny, not coincidence

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:59 AM]:

oh ok ok..

Let me just brief it out to you people.Actually,I have recently joined Wipro and went to Bangalore for training.There I met Priya,Ramgopal and Suhas.And somehow we had similar mentalities(likemindedness) and had an opportunity of knowing each other very well during our bench service in between trainings and all.All the four of us are from completely different backgrounds,but that did not stop us from becoming friends(actual very good friends)And again as we were discussing something in Grameen(restaurant),as I am a believer of destiny,I told them that we(all the four of us) meeting here and becoming friends is not just a coincidence but destiny(it had to happen..so it happened).

Continuation of the conversation….

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [9:59 AM]:

my mom was talking about slightly different things, but the basic idea was the same

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [9:59 AM]:

ok..thats good....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:00 AM]:

somebody feels the same as i do...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:00 AM]:

well, but not me

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:00 AM]:

yeah yeah i know....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:01 AM]:

so what do you believe in?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:01 AM]:

the mind, the human spirit overcoming all odds. and above all, freedom

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:01 AM]:

ok...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:02 AM]:

you know Rabindranath Tagore's poem, "Where the Mind is without fear"?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:02 AM]:

no....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:02 AM]:

may be i read it...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:03 AM]:

its the perfect expression of what a country should be and should have

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:03 AM]:

hmm..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:03 AM]:

ok...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:03 AM]:

i'll send it to your mail in a while

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:03 AM]:

ok sure sure....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:09 AM]:

wait, i'll type it in outlook and send it

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:09 AM]:

okay...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:12 AM]:

check your mail

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:13 AM]:

okay..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:14 AM]:

yeah....it is also true.....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:14 AM]:

read it?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:14 AM]:

i mean..u should not leave trying for something saying...it is destiny....and if I am destined to get it..i will get it...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

i think u have a tagline ...karmanyee vaadhikarastee....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

maafaleshu kadaachana

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

when u want something...u should belive in your hardwork..and give it your best shot..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

maakarmafalaheturbhuhu matesvango akarmani?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

but then..after that..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

when the result time comes......

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

it is destiny which wins...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:15 AM]:

what say?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:16 AM]:

and who do you believe decides the destiny?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:16 AM]:

and on what basis?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:16 AM]:

i dunnoo that...but definitely...not us(who do the hardwork)

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:16 AM]:

we are just kartas....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:17 AM]:

fine, but if everything is pre-destined, there has to be someone doing the deciding, right?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:17 AM]:

yeah......

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:17 AM]:

and for that someone, you are like a puppet?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:17 AM]:

may be.....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:17 AM]:

or maybe, like a lab rat?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:18 AM]:

i am not very sure about this concept.....it will ultimately end up in believing in god or not...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:18 AM]:

no, lets forget god right now... just take this concept and see where it leads us

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:18 AM]:

i believe that there is some super natural power above us..and that guides us..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:18 AM]:

yeah..i know..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:18 AM]:

it leads to god...that god exists....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

ok, but on what basis does it guide us? why, for instance, do you like classical music and someone else hate it?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

hmmm.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

that is what we cant figure out...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

see...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

in vedas..it is sad it seems....

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:19 AM]:

is it that we cant figure out or is it that we haven't tried enough to figure it out?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:20 AM]:

the science truths which were discovered.....are existing long before we are born...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:20 AM]:

and it will exist even after we die.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:21 AM]:

so..we are not the persons who can comment on..whether god is there or not...it is just a feeling which is kept alive in our hearts..we cannot prove god..because...it exists before we came onto this earth..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:21 AM]:

and will be there even after we die....so we are not at all nominated to question its existence...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:22 AM]:

but even gravity existed long before us, and will exist long after us... that didnt stop us from proving gravity, did it?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:22 AM]:

hmmmm...we just discovered it.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:22 AM]:

we did not prove it...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:22 AM]:

and I'm not questioning its existence, at least not at this moment. I'm merely analysing what the existence of this guiding force means, the consequences of its existence

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:23 AM]:

similarly.....many of us have a feeling that there is something above us..which rules us..but we dont have the strength to prove it..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:23 AM]:

we cannot comment on its consequences and things like that..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:24 AM]:

we are just a passing by cloud.....who can just feel the existence of god in various ways..but can never actual know of its existence or consequences..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:24 AM]:

why not? even you are commenting on the consequences of the existence of the guiding power, aren't you? thats what you're doing when you say that the power guides you, after all

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:25 AM]:

it is just our perspective about what is happening with us in our lives...i actually dont know whether these things are happening to me because god is there..or because of some other thing....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:25 AM]:

it is just a mental belief which i have..thats it..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

thats why i said..destiny....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

and i dunnoo who decides our destiny..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

if you believe in destiny, then you also obviously believe that everything in the universe is PRE-determined?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

we can have many answers for it..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

ok fine, forget who decides and who doesnt. do you believe everything is pre-determined?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:26 AM]:

hmmm.....not exactly predetermined...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:27 AM]:

it is just that the way things happen..happen according to a rule and rythmn which we cannot control..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:27 AM]:

kyaa khayaal hai?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:27 AM]:

fine, things can happen beyond our control, no problems

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:27 AM]:

hmm...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:28 AM]:

and I'm no even talking about any deciding force or god or anything.

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:28 AM]:

hmmm...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:28 AM]:

but still, doesnt "destiny" mean that the course of the universe is already fixed? everything that is going to happen has already been fixed?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

okay..listen to me...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

see...u wanted to become a great singer...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

and u have put your heart and soul into it..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

and you are really talented and worth it..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

you go for a competition.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:29 AM]:

and you know that there is no other person who is better than you....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:30 AM]:

but still.....in some instances or cases..u might not get the first prize

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:30 AM]:

why do you think this happens??

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:30 AM]:

u know you are woth it...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:30 AM]:

but still you dont get it...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:30 AM]:

why?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:31 AM]:

your bad luck... but in this case, do you feel that it was already fixed that the person would not win the prize?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:31 AM]:

yes.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:31 AM]:

i mean to say....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:31 AM]:

things may not be fixed....but they happen in a way....which we cannot control...even by our hardwork or human effort...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:32 AM]:

or.....to put it this way..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:32 AM]:

what is luck??

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:32 AM]:

who decides it...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:32 AM]:

or how does it come to you?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:32 AM]:

when u know u are worht it...why didnt you get the prize??

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:33 AM]:

In any given situation, there is going to be some randomness. That is inherent. And so sometimes, results are not what you expect them to be. That's what we call luck. Luck, according to me, is a name we give to the randomizing tendency of events.

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:34 AM]:

Its like this. You know Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:34 AM]:

randomizing tendency of events..is the one which i call as destiny....which might be a physical force....or a mental....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:34 AM]:

i know that principle...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

there are things which you dont have control over...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

then who controls them??

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

thats is what i call the super natural power...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

it might be god and it might not be god...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

According to that, you can't predict the motion of an electron along with its position. Now assume the electron is in position X and you want it to go LEFT. When you observe, it goes right. Why does it go right? Randomness. No other answer for it

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:35 AM]:

but there is some physical power above us

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

i know that principle yaar and that randomness is what I call the extra natural power..which we don’t have..and that is god..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

science is very closely related to the power which i talk about...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

maybe, that is perfectly possible. but i feel its not necessary and is a very complex answer to a question when simpler answers are available

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

why does the electron go right.....

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

because of something whcih controls its motion...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

right or wrong?

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:36 AM]:

why should something control the motion?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:37 AM]:

something maaneee.....some force...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:37 AM]:

u know that we held by different kinds of forces right?

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

some force whcich makes the atom take that behaviour...

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

alternatively, why should only ONE thing control the motion? there is a school of thought that everything in the universe influences every other thing. So the fact that I was sneezing yesterday may be one of the many factors behind the movement of the electron to the right

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

Yeah,in a very scientific terminology..i call the physical forces which control us as god..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

yeah..exactly..

Suhas Karnik (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

now you're again reminding me of my mom

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

there might be a number of forces ruling us...

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

now..

Purna Koumudi Vogeti (WT01 - EAS) [10:38 AM]:

i call all those forces put together as god.