So fast. And I really miss this baby and toddler Mahati. These days whenever she sleeps, I can’t help but sit beside her with emotions so strong that they are threatening to burst out of my eyes.
This nostalgic feeling of the peacefully sleeping daughter but at the same time , how much she has grown. She is not a baby or a toddler anymore and I really miss that phase of hers. That phase in my daughter’s life is gone forever and will never come back.
I can’t imagine this day would come when I would really put it into words and grieve the loss of that baby phase so much. I miss those cutie cutie pronunciation of the words , I miss that feeling when she slept on my lap when I sat cross legged in a lotus position. I miss that feeling whenever I picked her up and she would rest her legs on my tummy. I miss those moments so much that it actually hurts.
Why are we parents in such a hurry for the children to grow up ? These phases in her life are never going to come back. And just looking back the pictures and videos is just not enough.
Why couldn’t I just slow down a bit when she was small and enjoy things in a much more relaxed way? Why was I always in a hurry to get things done and get through the day ?
May be I could persuade the days to be a bit longer and the nights to be a bit shorter…………….. just may be !!!
She is a girl now , not a baby girl any more.
So I enjoy the feeling of co-sleeping much more, without any guilt now-a-days because no matter how much you try , your baby will still grow up and get her own room and sleep separately.
So I enjoy and look forward for her to come back from school and chat , because no matter how much I try , she is definitely going to grow up , study and leave the house for higher studies or for a job.
And I am reminding myself that there are only so many more days that she is going to ask for my help and my opinion , because there will definitely come that day when she doesn’t need them anymore.
Damn , there will come that one day when she will not need me any more………